Toddler is potty trained… but will only poo in her nappy!

First, you are not alone. This is one of the most common issues, whether you potty trained recently or a year ago a lot of parents find their toddler categorically refuses to use the toilet to poo.

And because we don’t want them to be “traumatised” or because you don’t want to create a negative association or because you simply can’t have anothe battle, you keep giving them their nappy. Now, if you’re happy doing that then by all means - skip this newsletter and carry on. However, if you’re ready for a change here are some tried and tested games you can play.

Games? Yes, games!
As you’ve probably realised, you can’t force a toddler (or anyone) to poo - so rewards, encouragement, praise, pleading, coercion or shaming are likely to get you… nowhere.

Now there are lots of reasons why your toddler may be refusing to poo on the toilet, but if you’ve ruled out constipation, wanting privacy and being afraid of the toilet then play could be the answer to their resistance. How does it sound to spend 10 minutes each day playing with your toddler and observing what happens?

If you’ve attended one of my classes you know I always recommend playing with poo dough. You could also ask your child if they mind if you do a poo on the kitchen floor and pretend to pull your pants down. Then allow her to direct you where you can and can’t poo around the house - this will return a sense of power and control to them, which may be what they are needing in order to “let go” of their poo.

Finally, have a look at what’s going on in your life (and your toddler’s life) and how you are feeling about the whole situation. Is there anything you could do differently, like letting go of anger around the situation?

If you need more support please get in touch! Whilst these issues are common you can meet everyone’s needs and stop using nappies. And I highly recommend the book Attachment Play by Aletha Solter.