A bucket-full of tears

I once heard someone say that we’re all born with a bucket-full of tears, and it stayed with me.

Most of us spend our entire lives emptying that bucket a thimbleful at a time.

But babies - if we let them - empty it a mug at a time.

And the more they empty it, the smaller that bucket becomes.
The smaller it becomes, the easier it is to feel the truth of themselves:
their joy, their presence, their openness, their ease.

Because the more we empty that bucket, the easier it is to come into close contact with the true contents of ourselves.

So many of us spend adulthood learning how to do this work — slowly, cautiously, often with professional support.

Babies and toddlers, on the other hand, already know how to release. They come equipped with the wisdom to cry, rage, shake, laugh — to empty that bucket.

What they need from us isn’t fixing, shushing, distracting, or rushing them through it.
They need us to stop interrupting the process.

When crying is welcomed early, it doesn’t get bottled up later.
It creates space — in the body, in the nervous system, in relationships.

And if you’ve ever felt worried or even guilty because no amount of rocking, bouncing, shushing, or “doing the right thing” would stop your child’s tears — this might be a relief to hear:

Those tears weren’t a problem.
They needed to come out.