YES to LOUD BEDtIMES!
First things first: bedtimes are a personal affair (ie: different for each family & their own circumstances). They're also often one of parents' least favourite parts of the day. We're tired. We're counting down the minutes until they're asleep. We've done the job of a whole village, plus our non-parenting jobs all in one day. We're feeling under-resourced and impatient... I get it.
And this newsletter will probably not solve all your bedtime gripes. But I do hope it gives you permission to forget what you've been told and make bedtime fun. And your own.
So, you've probably heard that bedtimes need to be calm and quiet, right?
You may have even been told to use hushed voices and slow movements and dim lighting. To not respond if our children start getting agitated or to leave them alone until they calm down...
There is definitely a time to be calm and quiet at bedtime, usually when we read books, recount the day, or tell them a story in the dark. But what we're not told is that there's also a time & place for movement, loud voices, jumping up and down. There's a place for rough & tumble, and silliness and being physical.
But, have you noticed your child gets an energy boost about an hour before they go to sleep? Do they get extra loud and run all over the place just as you're trying to calm them down? Maybe this coincides with bath time or worse even, dinner time...
Children usually have a burst of energy around one hour before they go to sleep. It's as if their body is trying to get ready of any last remnants of unused energy and pent-up feelings so it can then relax enough to go to sleep.
So instead of fighting that energy, what if we allow it and even encourage it to come out? What if instead we actually played with them and joined in the rough & tumble? Keep reading for some more suggestions and things you may want to avoid for a better night's sleep.
Special Playtime
Here's an invitation for you. For the next two weeks, could you incorporate loud & physical play into your bedtime routine? Even 5 or 10 minutes will do, however long you can fit it and remain present. Set a timer (on your phone, or use a sand timer if you have one) so both you and your child know when the time is up. Inviting play (suggesting a pillow fight for example) is ok, but try not to direct their play.
Would you like to learn more about why Special Playtime helps with bedtimes and the 3 key ingredients needed for a good night sleep? Join the next round of UNDERSTANDING TODDLERS AND PRESCHOOLERS.